A not-so-good friend took the time today to tell me about her issues and really listened to my advice. her situation is very complicated but essentially her marriage is in trouble because she started to fall for another man. I say started because she recognizes the situation and is taking steps to rescue her marriage. My advice was honest and blunt. Choose. To put it simply she had to make the decision between her husband and the other man. I asked her questions about how and why she had feelings for another man and she answered honestly in return. In the end her decision was her husband. The reasons are not as important as the feelings behind the reasons. Some might object and say that the reasons are far more important but my arguement is this: the heart and the mind often argue over right and wrong but when a person really discovers the underlying emotion behind a decision or feeling then that person can through reflection and determination change the underlying emotion or emotions.

What can one person offer that another fails to through either ignorance or complacency and familiarity? What happens to a relationship that changes and leads one person to forget or take for granted their partner which in turn makes them drift away? People change, it is the base law of life, but how difficult is it to change with a person instead of changing in a direction that conflicts or creates a void between two in a relationship. Mariage is hard. Not physcially but emotionally. Those readers who are or have been in one know this. But how do we prepare for the eventuality that is a successful relationship?What questions mus we ask ourselves and what questions must we in turn ask our partners before we are truely prepared for what can be? The answer is not defined by words but instead by emotions. Does the dream have more meaning than the actuality of a relationship or is it the peace and desire to strive for the better of the group that a relationship can represent that drives us to seek something beyond ourselves?

I know this blog is deep and for some it might taste sour as I have no experience in a long term relationship let alone a marriage but before you condem my words take a hour, a day, a week even and then come back to this. Will time make the questions less potent or give each of us something new to reflect on as we read it and hopefully ponder them again.

Upon some personal reflection, it does put myself in a very interesting position. I stand alone without a partner and yet strive for the benifit of others still; as a friend, as a shoulder to cry on or an ear to hear their problems.

Yet, I still stand alone.

Sooooo, there's been alot and not alot going on with me since my last blog. I'm now a year older, 29. I'm living in Kansas City. I've been to both a Royals game and a Chief's game. I've been to all kinds of different shows from Metal to Musical with some Jazz mixed in. I'm still working at Iris Data Services and now that the sparkly new has worn off enjoy working there most of the time.  I play too much computer and don't get out enough mostly due to work obligations and the lack of social base here in KC.

Some details :P My birthday was good and I'm not really looking forward to the next one with any great excitement. 30 its looming ahead like a heavy coat you have to put on even if you hate wearing it. I look at my personal, professional and financial goals and find some areas lacking but others exceling. Professionally I'm in a growing company that constantly keeps me too busy but pays well. There is this really annoying coworker but even she isn't so much that I'd consider leaving (thats a weblog for the future). Personally I don't see my friends and family as much as I'd like and the lack of relationship is offsetting but not critical to my life. Financially well there's that classic statement things could always be better there.

I went to the Royals v. Cardinals game and was rooting for the Cards. Sadly they didn't win but it was still an excellent experience. The night was beautiful and the rain held off until after the game was over and everyone was in their cars. Got a little lost but found my way back thanks to the friend that went with me. The Chiefs game... well I'm quickly falling into the camp that says the Chiefs are the masters of choke artistry and disappointment. Needless to say they lost miserably but the seats were really good and I went with my dad so the experience was excellent.

Rockfest was a day of just crazy bands and awesome music! Chevelle, Saliva, STP to name a few. The Jonny Dare 15th aniverserary Concert was just awesome as well with Jackyl and their chainsaws, the chair didn't survive  :). The Jazz experience was incredible and the company was welcome and excellent! More recently tuesday night I went to the Lion King Musical which was AWESOME!!!!! If you get the chance see it. You won't regret it.

If you've made it this far have a cookie, maybe some milk... reward yourself :) I'm almost done. I didn't dress up for Halloween and even though I did buy a couple bags of candy I didn't get a single trick-or-treater so I'm stuck eating, said bags of candy.... mmmm butterfingers....

Thats all for now more to follow in a shorter interval than the last to this :)

What a funny little abbreivation! N.S.A. stands for No Strings Attached but I find the irony of this is that you can't have a NSA relationship. Even the act of sex releases chemicals that make the persons involved more dependant on each other. I mean honestly why even bother with that?